Thomas Wictor

I’m not a sports fan. Though I don’t dislike sports, I’m just not interested. I’m also not a breast fan. It’s not that I have an aversion to breasts; like sports, they just don’t interest me all that much. If I have to chose my favorite part of a woman’s body after her brain and face, I’ll say her bottom.

So the only reason I’ve studied the Jacky Chamoun flap is because of what it says about Lebanon and the state of journalism. If you don’t know, Jacky Chamoun is a Lebanese skier.

Three years ago she posed for a racy calender that displayed most of her body except her nipples and vulva. Recently someone leaked a video filmed during the shooting of her cheesecake photos. It contains bare breasts in it, so act accordingly.

Personally, I think the photos are tacky as heck. The thong view is particularly ugly and demeaning. But we’re in a confused era right now. Women both complain about being sexualized and sexualize themselves for fame and profit, so who knows how we men are supposed to react? I sure don’t, but I also don’t care. I mean, since women don’t even know how they view themselves, then I can’t be bothered to try and figure it out.

None of the women I know would strip down to demonstrate how empowered they are, but none of these same women whine about “the patriarchy” and the “heterocage.” They’re fringies, like me. We just sort of sit around marveling.

Jacky Chamoun’s decision to pose as nude as she could get without being totally nude doesn’t mean anything to me. It’s Lebanon’s reaction that I find fascinating and repulsive.

Initially, the Lebanese government said it would investigate Chamoun. After much of the population rallied to Chamoun’s side, the investigation has been dropped. The Lebanese sports minister’s rationale for the investigation was hilarious.

All measures should be taken in which Lebanon’s reputation and its international standing are not harmed.

Lebanese women posed topless to show that they stood with Chamoun.

“Some women are beaten or killed, others are raped, and the media shifts their attention to a confident, talented, beautiful woman who represents her country at the Olympic games,” said protester Cynthia-Maria Aramouni, who created the campaign “I’m Not Naked” in support of Chamoun. Aramouni was referring to Lebanese schoolteacher Manal al-Assi, who was reportedly beaten to death by her husband last week.

Yes, the Lebanese media is more concerned about Jacky Chamoun’s naked breasts than it is about the killing of Manal al-Assi. But the world’s media and the supporters of Jacky Chamoun are ignoring the elephant in the room, the greatest threat to Lebanon’s reputation and international standing.

Lebanon has a political party—Hezbollah—with an armed wing that engages in acts of international terrorism and starts wars with neighboring countries. Here’s its flag.

Hezbollah fighters are trained by the Iranian Qods Force, the unit in the Iranian Revolutionary Guards Corps assigned missions outside of Iran. After Syria, Hezbollah is their main client. Iran supplies Hezbollah with small arms, heavy weapons, and rockets. Hezbollah has adopted the Nazi salute, symbolizing its hatred of Jews.

On July 12, 2006, Hezbollah fired rockets into Israel as a diversion for an ambush on two Israeli Humvees inside Israel’s border. Three Israeli soldiers were killed, and two were kidnapped by Hezbollah and taken into Lebanon. In response, Israel invaded Lebanon, killed almost 1500 Lebanese, and did over a billion dollars worth of damage to the country’s infrastructure.

Now, you can decry Israel’s retaliation. That’s fine. But the fact is, this is how Israelis retaliate. Everybody knows that. They’ve known it since 1948. After the 2006 war with Lebanon, which lasted thirty-four days, Hezbollah has left Israel alone. Instead, Hezbollah turned its sights on its own countrymen. It threatened the government with armed overthrow and conducted drills on how it would do so if an international tribunal indicted Hezbollah for the assassination of former Lebanese prime minister Rafik Hariri on February 14, 2005.

Sectarian violence followed in 2008; Hezbollah’s political bloc caused five months of deadlock in 2009 but then toppled the government on January 12, 2011. On January 24, Najib Mikati was chosen by Hezbollah to be the new prime minister. After five months of bickering he was sworn in. Mikati resigned on March 22, 2013, due to the inability of the pro-Syrian Hezbollah and the anti-Syrian groups to cooperate.

Lebanon was without a government for ten months, announcing only today that it’s achieved a breakthrough.

So, imagine if the Democratic party had an armed wing that was more powerful than the US military. Imagine if the Democratic party’s “militia” assassinated Republican politicians with car bombs, murdered Tea Party members, and started wars with Mexico and Canada. Imagine if the Democratic militia received weapons and training from Russia.

Imagine if the Democratic party made boastful videos about the wars it fought in our neighboring countries.

But a skier’s naked breasts threaten “Lebanon’s reputation and its international standing”?

Unbelievable. Genuinely incomprehensible to me. The important things in geopolitics are one woman’s naked breasts, not the murderous, racist, fanatical terrorists holding the entire nation hostage.

The final layer of surreality is that the terrorists holding Lebanon hostage are delusional, aided and abetted by the world’s press. During the 2006 war, Hezbollah fired over seven hundred state-of-the-art Russian antitank missiles but destroyed only four Israeli tanks. In addition, one tank was destroyed by a land mine. That’s an absolutely pitiful return on investment for Hezbollah.

Also, the much-vaunted Hezbollah rocket strategy was a bust. The terrorists fired about four thousand rockets into Israel, killing forty Israeli civilians. Four more died of heart attacks. The rockets served as no deterrent whatsoever, and only 23 percent hit in populated areas.

The Israeli Defense Forces suffered 119 killed in action. Hezbollah kept its casualties secret, but the number is around five to seven hundred. Since Hezbollah lacks naval vessels, aircraft, and armor, a direct comparison can be made only in terms of infantry. The Israelis lost seventy-five infantrymen in combat, versus the five to seven hundred Hezbollah infantrymen.

For some reason the world’s press heralded this lopsided slaughter as a great victory for Hezbollah. It must be “accountability journalism,” which has done wonders for the industry. According to this new approach, journalists must tell the truth “as they see it.” Great. Excellent. But if you’re an idiot who doesn’t know anything about military matters, then the truth as you see it will be utter nonsense.

The terrorists of Hezbollah are now in Syria fighting Sunni terrorists and the terrorists of the Assad regime. So far at least 130,000 have been killed. But a skier’s naked breasts are what matters.

A newspaper is a collection of half-injustices
Which, bawled by boys from mile to mile,
Spreads its curious opinion
To a million merciful and sneering men,
While families cuddle the joys of the fireside
When spurred by tale of dire lone agony.

A newspaper is a court
Where every one is kindly and unfairly tried
By a squalor of honest men.

A newspaper is a market
Where wisdom sells its freedom
And melons are crowned by the crowd.

A newspaper is a game
Where his error scores the player victory
While another’s skill wins death.

A newspaper is a symbol;
It is feckless life’s chronicle,
A collection of loud tales
Concentrating eternal stupidities,
That in remote ages lived unhaltered,
Roaming through a fenceless world.

—Stephen Crane